i woke up, feeling lousier than ytr... when i woke up, there are only 3 things in my mind.. and the revolve around the same thing. No, i didn't have any dream ytr, so it can't be related to that dream. I'm on a losing battle. i can't see the light of hope, it had totally shut me off. but in my heart, there's a small lil room, that's still holding that flame of hope. i thought it's gonna go off.. but it's not, it's disturbing me.

and now, my brother is being a sweetie pie... one big morning.. he used his friend msn to talk to me.. and asked me y i look so sad... and even offered to pour milk for me. ahhh. do i look sad? i don't even feel sad, i feel odd. bah! i hope there's someone out there who can cheer me up! and... yup.. haz, thanks for doing that.. =)

Wait... i will... i jus don't know how long will i have to wait. it might not even happen in this life time. it's gonna be a long wait... 3 years have past, how long more?