AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! what is this what is this?! i wanna cry!! i'm freaking paranoid!!! very irritated.. ok lah! all melinda and her anger again lah! i wish i wsa nv once here so tht you won't konw me at all... and this irritatinf melinda! y are human like this, tell me!! argh!!!! tried my best and yet like htt.. y do i hurl??? y can't i hide? i feel so restless and breathless.. you are not who you are anymore.. you are jus like a leech! wht do you think you are? some big queen or king? i don't wish to care about you anymore!!! but y are you still in my mind! wht an ass! i shouldn't have give a damn! i've been wrong in the first place! God had gave me the right road but i've failed to follow it... i tot tht knowing you and guiding you is wht he ask of me to do for now.. but it's completely not true... i feel like banging my head on th ewall.. you made me feel like a fool! i know.. you'll be successful one day... and i'm here for you to play only what... knowing melinda got what benefit? only one stupid piece of thing... what can she do? nothing.. unlike other ppl who can give you so much more benefits rite?! don't tell me tht i'm wrong again.. coz tht's wht you are letting my fail... i dislike this part of my life... so sensitive for what?

everything seemed to go wrong.. everything.. from the simplest things to the hardest! all wrong!!! my life only revolve com com com.. piano piano piano.. get a life lah! i think i'm a bad luck person.. who ever with me is going to suffer... whtever thing tht is under me is not going to succeed.. it's all my fault! i really start to think this way.. i couldn't be more optimistic about the situation.. why is there always problem in places i am in? why isn't there peace for me? y must i assume so much of myself when i'm jus trying to be an ass?! i'm not talented.. not smart... bad tempered.... pls lah.. it's like a waste of resource on me.. what can i do?! nothing unlike the rest of those ppl around me.. all smart smart de... talented.. beautiful... y must it end out like this? God.. give me an answer.,.. i'm suffering inside... i can feel the distance btw us now... y is the devil working within me? y must i grow to be vulnerable... as strong as i may seem to be... but a fool i am. get out of me life! out you go! i will treat it as i've nv know you such a person... i dont know to know it too...

Lord... keep all my temper aside after these... i dislike being angry and sad! i don't like it... bring me out of this and walk with me... for you know how i'm feeling now...